This post is a little different – it’s personal. It’s about the loss of my mother, Carol Ann Caivano. Someone who was very special to me and to so many others. I feel so blessed and fortunate to have such a wonderful mother. I always felt that my mother was a living saint. At least I knew she was a better person than I.
After her passing so many of my extended family and her friends came to pay their respects. They said such nice things about her. I was really touched by a tribute on Facebook from one of her good friends. You can read it at https://www.facebook.com/Taxlienlady/posts/10227166680616637
Declining Health
Mom’s health had been declining these last couple of years. I didn’t even know the extent of all her ailments. My sisters did. One of my sisters took her to all of her doctor’s appointments. And she had all kinds of specialists for her various ailments. There was something wrong with her heart. I’m not sure what exactly and she also was low on Oxygen and iron. These last few months she was on oxygen and when she went anywhere she was in a wheel chair.
About a month ago, right before her 83rd birthday, she contracted COVID along with my Dad, and my sister. Who, by the way, were all fully vaccinated. She wound up in the hospital with pneumonia, and then contracted an infection while in the hospital. The worst part was that none of us could see her because she was in a COVID ward. Through it all Mom kept her sense of humor, but she couldn’t stand not being able to see her family. We had zoom calls with her every day, but it wasn’t the same. She beat COVID and pneumonia and was moved to another wing in the hospital where we could visit.
Even though she beat COVID and pneumonia, she still had all her other health problems and now now her kidneys were failing and she was very week. She was released from the hospital to hospice care at home. We didn’t know how much time she had left, and she needed round the clock care.
Last days with Mom
She came home late Wednesday night on February 9. We all got to see her and spend some time with her on Thursday, Friday and Saturday. She passed away at 1:55am Sunday morning, February 13, 2022. The day before Valentines Day – her favorite holiday. She always did something special for each of her kids and grandkids on Valentine’s Day. The last time I saw her was Saturday night when I kissed her goodbye and told her I was coming back the next day.
She was in pain those last few days and was on morphine. Most of the time she was sleeping due to the morphine. But when she did open her eyes she was coherent and knew who everybody was. On Saturday I read to her from the book Revelations From Heaven by Randy Kay. I had listened to the audio version of this book and I wrote about it in the January issue of the Tax Lien Tips Newsletter. The book tells about the near death experience (NDE) of pastor Randy Kay. Pastor Kay was dead for 30 minutes in the hospital before he was resuscitated, and he tells about what he experienced in heaven.
I was reading that book to my mother because I didn’t want her to be afraid of dying. I’ve read the accounts of a few people – learned people, including an orthopedic surgeon and a brain surgeon, who died and came back to tell about it. No one who has ever had one of these experiences has wanted to come back. In fact some of them have suffered a bout of depression after being revived because they wanted to stay in heaven!
Dealing with the Loss of my mother
We had a beautiful funeral service for her on Thursday February 17, 2022. I had the privilege of picking out the readings and the music for her funeral mass, while my youngest sister with the help of a cousin did everything else. The priest, who had known her for years, gave a very wonderful homily and tribute to my mom. Yes I miss her, but I am so happy for her because I know for certain that she is with Jesus in heaven now. She is no longer in pain, no longer suffering and is happier than she has ever been because she is home with the LORD.
So many of my friends have offered their condolences, and I thank them for that. But the truth is I am good, I am better than good. I have a peace that surpasses human understanding and a joy that I cannot explain. As the well known hymn states, “All is well, all is well with my soul.” That is not one of the hymn that we sang at my mothers funeral service. But it comes to mind now because that hymn was written by Horatio Spafford. He wrote it after losing his four daughters in the tragic sinking of the last transatlantic voyage of the S. S. Ville Du Havre on it’s way from New York to the Normandy region of France.
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